and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
