God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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