You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
