i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
