All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I want to make a zoo with you.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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