The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
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i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
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I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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