I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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