YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
