I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize