He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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