So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize