I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
