yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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