On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize