I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
tell me about the eggs
Randomize