is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
