I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize