I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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