call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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