what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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