Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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