it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
