She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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