why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
