My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Sext me about skeletons
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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