Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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