I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
