I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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