is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
