The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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