I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
