i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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