The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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