just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize