After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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