So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
