I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize