So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
There's always time for handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize