she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
