nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
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