marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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