That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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