i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
