if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize