roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
