I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize