His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize