are you still at the devil's house?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
