pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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