Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
