Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize