Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
So much rum. So many feels.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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